| I burned my chin and I didn't even cry. Do you ever try to hide the fact that you are in pain? I didn't want to make a big deal about it but it burned the skin right off of it. When I was 16 I made a wish that I was invisible. I didn't want people to see me; I didn't want to be fussed over. I think it came true. Now I feel like no one will ever see me. Damn you Clay Aiken, I don't think you know what you were wishing for. Neither did I at the time. Man... What am I going to do? Wishes of a big display of specific grandeur are no longer relevant, or even desired. What in the end will be my freedom, release, ultimate revelation of destiny that quit possibly does not exist. Repressed emotion because of the unrealistic nature of hope. Does my burn represent the way I will cower and avoid primary needs of survival in a world that is striving to bury me underneath air pollution, landfills, and genocide? All hope is not hopeless. I should just stay away from all causes for contemplation, namely relationships. The first time I thought I was in love; I saw the big dipper. The second time I thought I was in love; I was awakened from my sleep. The third time I thought I was in love; all I wanted was control. The fourth time... I was not loved back at all. |
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